Helping Our Senior Loved Ones Create a Legacy
As adults age, they search to find ways to maintain control of their life as well as to share their legacy. Once a person’s health begins to decline, this task becomes more difficult. If you wish to be a true advocate for an elderly family member, then it is important to not only understand this developmental agenda but to also help the person achieve this goal.
When a senior sees their control slipping away, experts explain there are ways we can help give them back control both by our words and our actions. For instance, let your parents know you are there to help them “stay” in control. Get in the habit of using words with them that reflect this sentiment such as go ahead and make the decision. Other words that convey your faith in them are: you can manage, plan, direct or settle the matter. Phrase your questions by asking them what they want to do. By using this type of language, it helps them to regain or build confidence in their own abilities.
During the latter portion of our lives, the natural process of our bodies slowing down gives us more time for re-contextualizing about what we have done rather than what we will do. This is where creating a legacy comes into play. Seniors have the time to reflect on their life’s journey, the different paths taken and how those decisions affected the outcome of their lives. It is one reason seniors repeat stories as they are now told through the eyes of an older, wiser person who has learned from their experiences. Old stories are used to pass along life lessons and show the consequences of actions.
Adult children can help their elderly grandparents or parents create a legacy by asking questions such as what was their life like as a child, teen, young adult, etc. What things, deeds or values would they like to be remembered for? During your sessions with them, start with open ended questions like tell me about: your college days, first job, being a young mother, etc. Remember to let them lead the pace of the conversation and be patient during silent pauses. Additionally impart your sincerity and openness to learning more about them, and that it is important to you.
At the MorningStar of Parker senior living community, we are honored to provide older adults a warm and loving place to comfortably and securely age in place. With 49 suites for independent living and 54 suites for assisted living as large as 1609 square feet, seniors can choose between a wide range of floorplans and configurations. For those seniors suffering from Alzheimer’s and other forms of dementia, we provide 43 memory care suites.
Contact us to set up an in-person tour to one of the most desirable senior living communities in the area. Also be sure to ask about our latest offer of One Month RENT FREE for Assisted Living and Memory Care residents only.